Singer Tim McGraw put out a song a while ago called, “Live Like You are Dying.” I loved the song and its message. The message is basically, don’t put off everything you want to do in life for the future. None of us know how long we have to live. We all have an expiration date, we just don’t know when it is. We tend to live in denial of this reality.

However, if we suddenly get a diagnosis of some terminal illness this truth becomes very real to us. How would you decide to spend your life if you knew you only had a few months to live? What would become important to you? Would this change any of your priorites? Would you do anything different with the resentments in your life? 

If you are going to a counselor for advice and insight to life problems you want someone who is wise. Someone who will give you good advice that will help fix your problem. Let me introduce you to one of the wisest counselors who ever lived; no it is not Sigmund Freud. It is a man named Solomon. He wrote 3,000 proverbs about wisdom. He also wrote a book in the bible called Ecclesiastes, which is a wisdom book about the meaning of life. Life, death, the meaning of life are all subjects that greatly affect people’s mental health. In chapter seven and verse two he makes this statement: 

It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting. 

What is he saying? Is he saying it is better to go to a funeral than a party? What he is saying is that death is the end for all humans. We need to accept this reality and not live in denial of it. Our culture today lives in denial of death and therefore we are not prepared to deal with this reality when it comes into our life. Some will deny the reality of death their entire life. Others will face it usually somewhere between the ages of 45 to 55. This is often referred to as mid-life crisis. I call it the existential crisis; it is when people face their mortality. 

It is amazing and shocking once people realize how fast 50 years went by. Now they realize they have fewer years in front of them than behind them. Wise people will make this event a time of reflection and self-evaluation. Adjustments and decisions are made along with new plans to live out their legacy years more wisely and productively – to finish well. People make financial plans for retirement or do estate planning; why would we not do the same for our overall life?

Others will stay in a state of denial, anxiety, panic or depression. There is no evaluation, only a doubling down on more bad decisions and escapism trying to recapture a lost youth. The focus is on the past rather than the future. This will only produce a barrel load of regret and often alienates you from those you love. This approach can lead to finishing your life in isolation, or among strangers who pretend to be your friend for their own gain. 

Solomon also said: 

For this is the end of all mankind, and the living will lay it to heart. 

In other words, live like you are dying because you are. But this way of living is not depressing. On the contrary, facing and planning for this reality will lead to a better quality of life now. By accepting a few thought out life principles you will get from your life all it has to offer.

Let’s consider just a few of these principles. 

• First, we prepare for the reality of death and live in light of it. We embrace this truth rather than deny it. Meaning we see life as a precious gift and seek to live it to its fullest. So any day we wake up is a good day, we are still alive. There will be hard, painful and disappointing days but we will get through them just as we have done in the past. Remember this expression, “this too shall pass.” 
• Secondly, to accomplish goal one we seek to discover and live out God’s design for our life. Some people call this our destiny or God’s will for our life. Whatever terms you use, this is the reason we exist. This is why we were born at a particular time in human history. This is our best life. This life is a mixture of God’s sovereignty, God’s providence and our free will. As you live this life it will generate in you the feeling, this is what I was born to be and do. 
• Thirdly, this principle is what we use to build principle two on. God planned your design and chose you for this life-mission before he laid the foundation of the world. This is how important you are to him. You were on his mind and your role in his redemptive plan became the basis for how he designed you. Wouldn’t it be a shame to turn down such an opportunity for your life (you could if you choose to, remember free will). What would you put in its place? What could you do with your life on your own that could begin to compare with what God has designed for you? If you feel you have missed this opportunity then at your mid-life evaluation choose to jump into it. It is never too late to be a part of God’s design for your life. 
• Finally, once we have accepted the above truths and surrendered our life to his design; then we say to God what the psalmist said to him, “Teach me to number my days.” I accept I have a limited number of days on the earth. Only God knows how many. I want to make the most of each one, not wasting any. I don’t see this subject as something morbid or depressing but as a reminder to live each day to its fullest. I focus on the present because this is all I have. I learn from the past but don’t waste time rolling in regrets over past mistakes or lost opportunities. I don’t live in fear of a future that may never happen as I fearfully imagine it. 

Life is always in the present. I can only be where I am right now. Stay in the present or you will miss your life. Someone said, “Until you are ready to die you are not ready to live.” My interpretation of that though is this; until I have accepted the reality of my death I am not ready to make the most of my life. This is because at my core I don’t value the precious gift of life. Something that is rare has great value. My life is rare because it has limited days. I should be looking at how to make each one of those days count. Because when one of those days is gone it is gone. 

This expression also means I am designed for a higher purpose. So I don’t want to waste a day on living for anything less. From the day we were born we begin to die. By facing this truth we will get the most meaning, happiness and satisfaction along with the fewest regrets from our life.

This article is based on an excerpt from John’s soon to be released book, Chasing the Wind, advice from Solomon on how to avoid a life of boredom, discontentment and regret.